So for the past two or three days my body has hurt like hell, and when I say my body, it’s because I can’t say my back or my hips or neck or gut or knees because all of them hurt, maybe my arms and hands not so much, but maybe an elbow, and man, the headache, all of it just flat out hurt in ways that kind of made me want to lie down and whimper, ways that made me consider that possibly the end was near, that some horrid cancer had spread through my womb and abdominal cavity and had finally made its way to the spine, where it would slowly eat me alive and cause me to die in agony.
And thing about lying down and whimpering, I mean, it hurt worse to lie down than it did to stay up and move around and be active, just mindless physical stuff, although I’ve also been so physically exhausted that slogging up the stairs was a chore and it reaffirmed the end was getting near kind of scenario, or at least made me almost wish like hell the end was getting near, because my body hurt and I was so exhausted.
Even smoking weed didn’t help any. Not smoking didn’t either. Death awaited, for sure.
Then this morning, well, darned near brunch time in my world, like 0900 or some such, I decided I want to fix some more coffee, that one cup this morning left over and re-run through the pot (a horrendously gross sin against coffee, but I’m getting a little cheap), but I figured I’d add some fresh decaf, since I knew I had some decaf in the cabinet, I stocked up on all sorts of coffee last time I was at Trader Joes, and when I put on my glasses and looked in there and just saw the one big can of Organic Fair Trade Breakfast Blend I thought well hell, and sure enough, there in the coffee making cupboard was a can of Organic Fair Trade Dark French Roast Decaf, and I thought “f**k me running,” (one of my favorite phrases inherited from an elderly family member) “this thing is half empty already, I’ve been drinking decaf for days now”.
And suddenly, it dawned on me.
I fixed a small pot of real coffee. I could totally taste the caffeine as I drank it.
It was good.
I feel fine. I might even have another cup, pretty sure there’s another one down there in the pot. Maybe an iced latte, that would be nice.
So many nice benefits of caffeine.